The breakdown of a relationship usually results in many different issues having to be addressed. It can also make people focus on what is really important to them in life. Without hesitation, people often say "my children".

The result is that where a couple are separating, whether they are aware of it or not, they can have a common interest – to make sure that their children's future is secure. Both usually want to remain committed parents and do not want their children to suffer because their relationship has not worked.

Collaborative law approaches issues by focussing on outcomes which are beneficial to all. It promotes solutions rather than confrontation, but assists the parents in reaching those solutions themselves. It supports that link which two people continue to have as parents, and allows them to concentrate on what is really important to them and their family.

The ending of a relationship can give rise to many issues which affect the children: where will they live; what time will they spend with the other parent; what part will a new partner play in the child's life; how will their out of school activities be paid for… to name but a few. All issues are important, not just for the adults, but so that the children feel secure about the future.

By adopting the collaborative approach, parents are supported by their lawyers through the process of negotiating and reaching agreement on all of the issues that affect their children. Jointly, the parents can make plans for now and for the future. They remain in control of arrangements for their children, which often contrast sharply with the Court process, where a Judge may impose his or her own solution. Throughout the process of negotiation, each party's legal representative is on hand to give legal advice where it is required, and help in testing out the practicality of arrangements.

The benefits of resolving problems via the collaborative law option, are that parents can talk openly about their children, solutions reached are more workable, and it is less likely that one parent will feel alienated. The result is happier parents, which usually leads to happier children, who then continue to have two supportive parents available to them. A future where both parents can be present at the school play, graduation and wedding day, becomes a true reality.

To obtain more advice about how collaborative law may help you, please contact Jane Cowley on 01604 258027 or email jane.cowley@howespercival.com. who will put you in touch with one of the specially trained collaborative lawyers in Leicestershire. Alternatively, further information can be found online at www.resolution.org.uk/leicestershire.

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